Let us look at the light side of life and talk about the type of men most likely to \u2018steal\u2019 your wife from you \u2026 Of course if you are the cuckold, you will not find my article amusing in the least bit. But as they used to say in the olden days: \u2018Tough titty, pretty kitty; sometimes the milk is sour!\u2019\n\n1. Fake spiritual leaders\n\nThe first and worst type of wife stealers are fake pastors! They start by being spiritual counselors to her, to guide her on the path to \u2018heaven.\u2019 But soon after, they are poisoning her with all sorts of wicked words, like how a good Christian woman shouldn\u2019t be married to a heathen.\n\nAfter months upon months of \u2018kesha,\u2019 you find many of these \u2018men of God\u2019 trying to crawl into the underpants of married women (why do you think, on TV half the men being dragged out of lodges are these fake pastors)? Fake pastors should just be called \u2018men-of-the-under-cloth\u2019!\n\n2. Jim at the gym\n\n\nThen there are the proverbial gym instructors. A woman has become \u2018mwanamke mfupi short round,\u2019 and you, as the man of the house, no longer find her attractive even for the dutiful nocturnal \u2018mumulwas.\u2019 So she decides to hit the gym!\n\nYou decide \u2018hatawess make\u2019 and laugh at her efforts to jog around the estate at the crack of dawn when the city roosters are getting up to stretch their legs and crow at the sunrise. Suddenly, mama is no longer home at 6pm but instead gets home just in time for KTN Prime. She\u2019s at the gym every day except Sunday \u2013 for Manic Machine Monday, Tuesday Zumba Class, the Wednesday Circuit Work-out, Insanity Thursday, freaky Friday and salsa dance on Saturdays. Six months down the line, she is looking fine and glowing \u2013 both from the gym exercise but also from work-outs with \u2018Abdo\u2019 \u2013 the salsa instructor (Abdo is short for \u2018Abdomen\u2019, of course).\n\n3. Pedro the popstar\n\nThen there are those married women having a second \u2018youthful\u2019 phase as they head for forty. She has a bunch of girlfriends, some from her college years. They are in a weekend chama, Saturday afternoon with wine, to discuss money and men. Every Wednesday, they go to watch one of these fancy Afro-bands, and like MJ sang in \u2018Dirty Diana,\u2019 they know the boys in the band. Soon, she is having a hot dose with a musician called \u2018Kid Doom.\u2019\n\n4. Two is company\n\nThen be careful, also, about becoming \u2018couple friends\u2019 with another couple, as in you double date, and even go for holidays together, because the \u2018package is cheaper.\u2019 Cheap is expensive. The day you have hiccups in your marriage, and she begins to confide in your boy buddy (the man in your \u2018couple friends\u2019), you are kaput, especially if he has secretly had the hots for her.\n\n5. Bob the business buddy\n\nBosses, and other chaps of career authority, or even her business partner, are another great source of danger to a couple, especially if the two of them often take business trips together. Trust me, I have seen the mood after seminars in a lovely bar in some nice \u2018out of town\u2019 place, after a day of team building. With wine in her head, music in the air and wild animals out there, husband hundreds of miles away can become a distant memory.\n\n6. Number six will shock you!\n\nWatch out for opportunistic heroes. It could be that pediatrician, who always dashes around whenever the baby is ill. Or some shrink she sees, if you married one of the batty types, or even, shock, the gynecologist. Of course ex-boyfriends, ex-husbands and even college sweethearts from 1999 can be a threat when a woman is unhappy in her union \u2013 and she decides to roll back time to younger days, forgetting what split her from that \u2018sweetheart\u2019 in the first place. If you are rich, travel a lot, and neglect your wife, then watch out for that polite driver of hers; or if you are a government big wig, the over-solicitous bodyguard who is always \u2018yes, madame.\u2019 Remember, in movies, wealthy white men worry about plumbers or pool boys.